Beowulf and Godsylla Translation

Meanehwæl, baccat meaddehæle, monstær lurccen;
Fulle few too many drincce, hie luccen for fyht.
Ðen Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hrwærowþheororthwl,
Æsccen æwful jeork to steop outsyd. Þhud! Bashe! Crasch! Beoom! Ðe bigge gye
Eallum his bon brak, byt his nose offe;
Wicced Godsylla wæld on his asse.
Monstær moppe fleor wyþ eallum men in hælle.
Beowulf in bacceroome fonecall bamaccen wæs;
Hearen sond of ruccus sæd, "Hwæt ðe helle?"
Graben sheold strang ond swich-blæd scharp
Stond feorth to fyht ðe grimlic foe. "Me," Godsylla sæd, "mac ðe minsemete."
Heoro cwyc geten heold wiþ fæmed half-nelson
Ond flyng him lic frisbe bac to fen
Beowulf belly up to meaddehæle bar,
Sæd, "Ne foe beaten mie færsom cung-fu."
Eorderen cocca-cohla yce-coeld, ðe reol þyng.

Meanwhile, back at the mead hall, a monster lurking;
Full of few too many drinks, he looks for a fight.
The name, son of name,
Asks the awful jerk to step outside. Thud! Bash! Crash! Boom! The big guy
All of his bone broke, bit his nose off;
Wicked Godzilla wailed on his ass
Monster mopped the floor with all of them men in the hall
Beowulf in the backroom phonecall was;
Hearing sound of ruckus said, "What the hell?'
Grabbing a strong shield and a sharp switch-blade
Stood forth to fight the grimlic foe. "Me," Godzilla said, "make the mincemeat."
Hero quick got hold with famed half-nelson
And fling him like a frisbee back and forth
Beowulf belly up to the mead hall bar,
Said, "No foe beaten my fearsome Kung-fu."
He ordered them coca-cola ice-cold, the real thing.